Mom: "dinner is ready"
"Can you set the table"
birds need to shut the hell up. if i made half the noise they did at 5 in the morning i’d be arrested
when ur showing someone a picture on your phone and they try to look through all of your pictures
*In a Job Interview*
Interviewer: so tell me, why should we hire yo—
Interviewer: …I…I don’t see how that is supposed to hel—
Interviewer: i-if you could please stop doing t-tha—
Interviewer: SHIT BOI YOU GOT THE JOB GATDAM!!1!